Sunday, August 23, 2009

It's the end of the world as we know it......and I feel fine.

But for how long?

There have been these thoughts plaguing my mind lately. Driving me to insanity. I'm at that peak again, and it scares me like nuthin' else.

It's one of those things that I'm almost afraid to talk about. Actually, I don't know if I can. Last time I did something bad happened. And what if it's worse this time?

For me this time it started with the stories. Oh, friends, how I wish these were just stories, make believe, fiction. This is non-fiction. The kind that never ends.

A family. A lake. The wind. Blown tent. A young boy. Gone.

Could have been mine.

A mother. A womb. The beginning. Anticipation. Gone.

Could have been mine.

A car. A road. A father. Shattering. Gone.

Could have been mine.

Do I live with the fear? Do I look toward tomorrow expecting it to be my day for pain, for loss, for sorrow, for incomprehensible pain and guilt? The kind that seems to have no end? The kind you look on with this small shameful part of yourself that can't help but think thank goodness it wasn't me. This time. Do I count down the minutes, the hours, the days, until it's my mountain to climb? Wondering how I'll ever do it, wondering how anyone ever does?

There was one place I could find my answer. And find it I did.

"Wherefore, be of good cheer, and do not fear, for I the Lord am with you, and will stand by you; and ye shall bear record of me, even Jesus Christ, that I am the Son of the living God, that I was, that I am, and that I am to come."

Whatever is to come for me, He already suffered it.

Somehow, that makes it not so scary.


  1. I liked this post..thanks for sharing it..

  2. Sharla hang in there. It is God's strength that sustains us in these times wheither we believe in Him or not. The scripture you pointed out to is right on the money and the comment you gave after it...even more so. God has not gone through anything we have not and understands all things better than we...He designed us and made us all special. he would know what we need in these times better than anyone. Lean on Him and not others for His ways are not our own and our understanding is not His. Thank God He is perfect and I am not. That He was able to save us in our sinful state and not me...for I am guilty of all kinds of things and fail in so many ways that if it were up to me this world would be forever cast into the firey pits of hell. I am greatful that He is all knowing and mericful, kind, long suffering...the list goes on and on. Just live everyday as if it were your last and never let a moment go where you make wonderful memories with those around you. Do not be afraid to admit you were wrong if it comes up, and rejoice in those times that forgivness is given and mercy shines forth. Remember we are here just for a moment in an eturnity. We have our lives to learn and come to a better understanding of the love GOd has for us and has shown us. Your family are prime examples of that. He is a father to us. One who guides us and lets us learn. If we fall he is right there to help us. If we are hurt, sad, lonely, he is right there to help, comfort and love us. We are never alone even when we feel like we are. I love you dear friend. I too fear loosing a loved one or going through difficult times with such a loss. I try to replace that fear with hope knowing that I have a time to love and time to charish and time learn. I also try to take one day at a time and enjoy the moments I have with my loved ones...through the thick and thin knowing that I will charish every moment of joy, pain, sorrow, heartache, hope, love, compassion, mercy, long suffering...when they are gone. (it is only for a moment.) Lots of love, MaLinda

  3. Beautiful and perfectly true. with the Robert Manwill stuff going on here, I was stuck in that fear for 13 days... this is so true. Thanks for posting it today!

  4. MomNerd -

    Love this post. When something does happen to us it's also nice to read D&C 121:7-8.

    "My son, peace be unto thy soul; thine adversity and thine afflictions shall be but a small moment;
    And then, if thou endure it well, God shall exalt thee on high; thou shalt triumph over all thy foes."

    A little perspective always seems to help.

    How crazy that you live in Harvest Hills as well! I don't believe that we have met, but you're a musical person, are you involved in the Relief Society choir for stake conference? If so, I've probably seen you there a time or two!
    Thanks for the heads up for preschool, however, my son is already enrolled with my neighbor. If she ever stops teaching, though, I'll know where to find you!

  5. Thanks for sharing. God is always with us!

    20 + 4 hours a day, , forever!

    allibrary (at) aol (dot) com

  6. not only that but you know that if you lost someone that it would be only for a small amount of time, that if you had a trial it would only be for a small amount of time. Whatever happens we know that it will end eventually and in the larger spectrum of things it will just seem like the blink of an eye. Meanwhile Heavenly Father is there to help us get through it.


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