What do you say when your mind won't sit and stay?

My mind is full but my voice is silent. I seem to have so many emotions and feelings, concerns and worries swirling around in this crazy brain of mine that I can't make my mind be still long enough to actually come up with anything to say. So I'm just going to randomly write whatever comes to mind.....

I've been thinking a lot about suggestions people had for my blog and the one that keeps running through my mind is the comment by Jane when she said that I should blog for myself. So this one (that nobody reads anyway) is for myself. My other blog I hope I can make interesting but it will definitely have more pictures and family happenings and happiness like that. So here I am, saying what I think and feel and not caring if somebody reads it that may judge me. That's part of life I guess and I'll be happy if someone is reading no matter who.

I can't stop feeling sick to my stomach. I am going to apologize now to the pro Obama people out there but from the first time I heard that man he gave me a sick feeling deep in my gut and everything he has said and done and everything I've heard since then has not made it any better, only worse. I'll be the first to admit that some of what he says sounds good. But to me it's more like satan's plan kind of good. In other words, telling us what we want to hear which is not really what is going to happen and even if it does happen it won't happen in a way that is good for us. Nor will it be good for us in the long run. The last few days I have felt a pretty much constant panic. I am so scared for my children and the world that they will grow up in. I am scared that I won't be able to keep them safe and protected. I am scared that the end is drawing close and that I am not ready. I don't think we'll have a huge terrorist attack. I think he will do things that appear good to the general public while he slowly changes things and rips America apart from the inside. I can't give statistics or exact quotes, it's just a feeling deep in my gut.

But all I can do is wait and see, and try to see Obama as a Child of God. After all, what choice do I have? And I will pray, and keep doing my best to prepare for whatever may come. And most importantly I will have faith. That it will all turn out as it should. That my children will be safe. That America is still the country that I have such fierce pride in. That my preschoolers will always be able to say the Pledge of Allegience as we do each day, and that the words will be the same. That our soldiers will be respected and loved for what they have done and are doing. That America will hold on to it's values with all it has. At least those few that are left.

Oh, and one more thing.... go California!!!! (at least 52% of you)

I figured I might as well get my controversial feelings out now....shoot me if you want but I had to have my say after seeing so much pro Obama ummmm....crap....ahem, excuse me, a little frog in my throat.